I started masturbating when I was in my teen years, I would get multiple orgasms and I enjoyed this so much that I would do it on a daily basis.
I was brought up in a very strict family, I didn’t have a boyfriend till my last year in college and he is the one who broke my virginity.
Before that I always relieved my sexual urge through masturbation. I had multiple partners but have never enjoyed sex with them, the relationships don’t even last for long. I either lose interest or the guy just disappears silently.
It’s getting me worried, I got these dreams where I have sex with people well known to me in dreams. I get orgasms and am left satisfied. It feels so real and I wake up tired.
In a night I can have multiple orgasms, I wake up weak and some marks on my thighs but when I get into real sex with my partner I don’t enjoy at all.
I just have to fake orgasm and pretend that am enjoying just not to disappoint him. These relationships don’t last for long . I always get good guys but within a short period it ends.
I feel frustrated and I will go with anyone I please coz guys hit on me and I can’t turn them down. There is this addiction of which I don’t understand, am active sexually but I’d rather do masturbation to get the satisfaction and at the same time I have real sex which I don’t enjoy at all.
It’s getting out of control now, even if I have sex and pretend that I have had orgasms, later that night I’d have those dreams and I will be satisfied.
Most recent one I squirt and woke up so wet and soaked of which I was sure it wasn’t from my boyfriend. Am stressed and had to confess this. I don’t know how I can get help or to end all this..